Sense of Self
by Kamiyashi
Summary: Entangled Series 05. When Kaiba discovers the truth about the priest’s relationship with the thief in the past, he’s forced to confront what that means about the present. Prideshipping: YYxK. Corruptshipping: TBxPS.
1. Chapter 01: Into the Past

**Title: ** _Sense of Self_

**Series:** Part 05 of _Entangled_. Takes place shortly after _Aware_, just before school finishes.

**Summary: **When Kaiba discovers the truth about the priest's relationship with the thief in the past, he's forced to confront what that means about the present.

**Pairings:** Yami x Kaiba, Thief!Bakura x Priest!Seto, OC x Bakura

**Rating**: Rated **M** for sexually explicit scenes and a graphic lemon in the second chapter.

**Disclaimer:** _Yu-Gi-Oh!_ does not and will never belong to me.

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**A/N:** This chapter contains **sexually explicit scenes** between **Bakura x Teacher**, as well as **Thief!Bakura x Priest!Seto**. If you're not comfortable with this, you might want to wait for **next week's update** that is **Yami x Kaiba**.

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**Chapter 01: Into the Past**

"That's fine, move the appointment to Thursday," Kaiba consented to his secretary on the other line as he walked down the school hallway in search of an empty classroom to conduct his business. Realizing that would be difficult at such an hour, Kaiba decided on one of the teacher's conference rooms that he had negotiated access to early on in his academic career. "What about Sorace Industries? Have we heard back from them on that proposal yet?"

As his secretary filled him in on the details, Kaiba approached the first floor conference room and turned on a light as he entered. The first thing that alerted Kaiba that all was not as it should be was the muffled sound of terror that greeted him that was quickly followed up by a moaning laugh from a different source.

"Come to join us?" Bakura asked, chuckling when his partner whimpered in distress at being caught.

Staring at the scene with barely masked contempt, Kaiba was disgusted to see Chisanaga-sensei on his knees with Bakura's cock in his mouth. The tan fingers that were embedded in the teacher's hair almost seemed tender until he used his grip to pull at Chisanaga. "Did I finish yet?" Bakura demanded dangerously as he narrowed his eyes at his teacher. "Then keep sucking, _sensei_."

Remembering to hang up the phone, Kaiba had to contain his revulsion when Bakura moaned, "Not as good as the priest, but still worthwhile since _he_ won't play with me anymore," with a knowing look.

"Disgusting," Kaiba growled in his revulsion, both at the sight before him and the implications of the past with the thief.

"He thought so too, but that didn't stop him," Bakura taunted as he rested more of his weight against the wall. "Why are you letting it stop _you_?"

"I will _never_ be like him," Kaiba venomously hissed as he felt the bile rise in his throat.

Making a sound of mock disappointment, Bakura retorted, "I bet your mouth is just as talented," before interrupting himself with a gasp at Chisanaga's ministrations. "Maybe the pharaoh had taught you some new tricks…?"

"Bastard!" Kaiba swore angrily, his hand tightening into a fist around the cell phone. It was beyond him why he remained there, other than his feet were grounded by the shock.

"It's a shame you seem to have forgotten the best parts," Bakura continued, tenderly stroking the teacher's hair.

Unable to contain his reaction, Kaiba snarled, "There's noting to remember because nothing fucking happened!"

"You seem so sure about that, _Seto_," Bakura told Kaiba, wanting to make the reincarnation remember. "The sight of him on his knees is one I'll never forget…"

Kaiba was about to argue back, but he was suddenly thrown into a memory against his will.

_Soft sounds of wet pleasure interrupted the stillness of a cool Egyptian night, but angry blue eyes stared up at the thief with defiance, no love loss between them. "Glare at me all you want, priest," Bakura said, stroking soft brunette hair with a cruel tenderness. "It changes nothing."_

_Pulling back and letting the thief's cock slip from his mouth with an obscene noise, Seto growled, "Don't call me that!" He didn't want to be reminded of his official position when he was on his knees for the thief._

_Leaning forward, Bakura all but purred, "Would you rather me call you, 'Seto,' like him?"_

_Slapping away the caressing hand, Seto continued to glare at Bakura with unmasked contempt. The action angered Bakura and he roughly yanked Seto back to his previous place. "Continue," Bakura coldly ordered._

_Balking against the command, the priest still reluctantly complied and resumed pleasuring the thief with his mouth. It made Bakura lean back with a sigh of enjoyment as he pet the priest's hair in return. Even then, Bakura was unable to resist murmuring, "I wonder if she does this for him as beautifully as you?"_

_Even the mere thought of Nefersherit doing such a thing to his pharaoh revolted Seto and he growled his displeasure around the cock interned in his mouth. _

_The sensation shot through Bakura and he thrust hard in response, laughing when the priest gagged. Allowing Seto a moment recover, Bakura finally confided, "I thought about killing her, you know," and was surprised by that look of horror on Seto's face. "Don't look at me like that. I would do it for you, but you don't want your precious little pharaoh to be sad."_

"_She's not worth killing," Seto stopped to mutter._

"_Not when she drives you closer to me," Bakura agreed, capturing the priest's lips and tasting his own essence. "You _will_ belong to me, priest."_

_Nipping at the thief's invading tongue out of irritation, Seto spat, "I will _never_ belong to you!"_

_Smiling sadly at the priest, Bakura gently stroked his cheek. "If that bastard pharaoh is stupid enough to let you go for her, he doesn't deserve you, Seto," Bakura told the priest in a rare moment of sentimentalism. "You will become mine because he is a fool."_

"_No!" Seto vehemently denied._

"_You are only his priest," the thief reminded, "only his loyal subject and servant."_

"_I am—"_

_The thief interrupted, "A fool for loving him when he loves—"_

"No!" Kaiba shouted as he ripped himself out of the memory. He thought that he was going to be sick from what he had seen and Kaiba continued to deny it. "No, that never happened!"

Unsure of what Kaiba had remembered, Bakura could only comment, "You're as bad as that damn pharaoh of yours. Always in denial…"

"_No_!" Kaiba repeated as he took a step back to the door. He kept reassuring himself that it never happened and yet somehow there was an element of truth to it all.

"Just remember that I stayed by the priest's side long after the pharaoh was gone," Bakura said before succumbing to his release with a low moan as his eyes fluttered shut.

Unable to tolerate it any further, Kaiba turned and walked out of the conference room, ignoring the laughter that followed. He couldn't stand thinking that the priest had actually betrayed the pharaoh in such a terrible way and Kaiba had to fight against the ill feelings that resulted from his new knowledge. How could the priest do such a thing while the pharaoh was still alive? How could he even do it all?

Kaiba was walking blindly through the empty hallways and he was somewhat unsurprised to discover himself in front of Yami's classroom. He could hear the teacher droning of about something and Kaiba opened the door before he could talk himself out of it. There was an irrational desire to see Yami, to reassure himself of the present.

Everyone turned when the door opened and looked at Kaiba in confusion and relief over the boring less on being interrupted. The teacher bowed formally at the teen and Kaiba gave the slightest nod of acknowledgement in response. "Yes, Seto-sama?" the teacher asked politely, closing the book he was holding and giving Kaiba his undivided attention.

"Pardon the intrusion," Kaiba formally stated out of habit, "but Yami's presence is required elsewhere. Please inform his other teachers that he will be absent for the remainder of the day."

"I'll be sure to do so," the teacher politely agreed, although he was somewhat mystified by the source of the announcement. "Is there anything else?"

"No, that will be all," Kaiba declined, pleased to see that Yami was hurriedly packing up his things. Not waiting for him to finish, Kaiba stepped back and shut the door so that he could call his secretary back; he had almost forgotten about hanging up on her.

Yami appeared shortly, but Kaiba gave no sign of noticing other than to gesture for him to follow while he continued rearranging his schedule for the day with his secretary.

Figuring Kaiba's tense agitation was a result of being in business mode, Yami shrugged and followed without question. Yami was curious about what had made Kaiba pull him from class, but he figured it could wait until later. Either way, Yami had no complaints about the reprieve from what was otherwise a very boring day.

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**A/N:** It's funny, because I thought this chapter was originally going to go a different way. And yes, Chisanaga-sensei is the one referenced in _Catnip Dream_. He's back from medical leave, which is why Bakura was going easy on him and not being as strenuous as normal, heh.

As for the reason why Seto was doing that with Bakura...well, that's a different story entirely. XD

Poor Yami, he has no idea what he's about to walk into when they get back to the mansion…The happy stuff comes after that, promise.

**NEXT CHAPTER: Into the Future  
**

_Kaiba tries to comfort himself with Yami, but things go horribly astray._

Chapter goes up on Sunday, March 8th, so check back for the conclusion to this twoshot! It'll be nice and long with only Kaiba and Yami, so the pureists can come out of hiding then~~~.


	2. Chapter 02: Into the Future

**A/N:** This one is all **Yami x Kaiba**, but it's a bit intense. If you're squeamish about **graphic and hard sex with a hint of noncon**, you might want to skip the **lemon**.

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**Chapter 02: Into the Future**

Once they were in Kaiba's bedroom and he was off of the phone, he wasted no time in stripping Yami of his uniform. Yami was a little surprised by the rough way Kaiba was handling him, but he wasn't complaining as he helped return the favor. There was something exhilarating for Yami about the dominating and hungry kisses from Kaiba and he moaned his appreciation even as he was questioning, "What's gotten into you?"

Not bothering to answer, Kaiba nudged a now naked Yami toward the bed and hurried to join him. Pinning Yami's hands above his head to prevent them from wandering, Kaiba continued vigorously kissing him in an attempt to find relief from the mess of feelings inside of him. It was too hard to try and keep Yami restrained and make any progress, so Kaiba relinquished his hold in order to kiss and nip his way along the former pharaoh's body.

Yami cried out when Kaiba left a mark on him and he looked questioningly into conflicted blue eyes. "Seto…?" he asked hesitantly, getting the impression that something else was going on with Kaiba. It felt like it was more than work related, but Yami didn't have much else to go off of other than his suspicion.

Not wanting to answer any questions, Kaiba started aggressively kissing Yami to prevent him from asking anything while simultaneously stroking the former pharaoh's rapidly hardening member. Only when he was certain that Yami would be left breathless and on the brink of unable to think did Kaiba stop in favor of moving onto other things.

Kaiba was trying to throw himself into his actions, to abandon himself to giving Yami pleasure, but every time the former pharaoh moaned, "Seto," it reminded him of what he had seen, of the other voice he had heard say his name the same way. It made Kaiba swear angrily, but he refused to comment on the name issue to Yami; he didn't want the other to know about what had happened.

The next time it happened, Kaiba paused in his passionate efforts to lay claim to Yami. It made him realize that it wasn't supposed to be about that, was it? The question wasn't whether or not Yami belonged to Kaiba—of that he had no doubt—but whether or not the same was true in reverse.

"What am I?" Kaiba demanded in a growl.

The question was slow to process through his hormonal haze and Yami could only respond with an inarticulate, "Huh?"

"What am I to you?" Kaiba gruffly clarified as he leaned back to look at Yami.

Realizing that his initial suspicions had been correct that everything had been about more than just getting pulled out of class because Kaiba was horny, Yami did his best to compose his thoughts. "My…boyfriend?" Yami uncertainly answered, still unsure about what Kaiba was truly going on about at the moment.

"Does that mean I'm yours?" Kaiba harshly demanded.

There was an almost wild and unbalanced look in those normally cool ice blue eyes and it intrigued Yami almost as much as it concerned him. "What?" Yami asked, still not following Kaiba's thoughts.

"Does that mean I'm yours?" Kaiba repeated, his eyes narrowing in displeasure at being forced to do so.

"As much as I am yours," Yami finally replied after taking a moment to think about it.

Yami's response gave Kaiba moment to pause as he turned it around in his mind. It was a fair answer, but it still didn't tell Kaiba what he wanted. In a deadly serious tone of voice, Kaiba asked, "Do I _belong_ to you?"

The question felt like one of the most dangerous trap cards Kaiba had ever played and Yami's mind was rapidly trying to find a way to defuse it. "You are not a possession," Yami carefully responded, hoping that it was an appropriate response.

"I am owned by no one!" Kaiba viciously hissed, startling Yami.

Reaching up to stroke the side of Kaiba's face, Yami reassured him, "I know, Seto."

Jerking away from the soothing touch, Kaiba repeated his question again, "Do I belong to you?"

It was enough to make Yami realize that there was a difference between the two questions Kaiba had asked him. Yami cautiously questioned, "As a brother, you belong to Mokuba, right?"

Kaiba said nothing, but Yami got the distinct impression that he should continue. "Then yes, as a lover, you belong to me," Yami finally stated. "_Only_ to me."

"How?" Kaiba asked, all of the anger gone from his tone and replaced by quiet confusion.

Sincerely hoping that he wasn't making a huge miscalculation, Yami overthrew Kaiba and pined him down with an ease that shocked himself. It was almost like Kaiba had allowed for it to happen and that momentarily confused Yami before he refocused himself. "Would you like me to show you?" Yami asked in a seductive voice as he brushed his lips against Kaiba's in an almost kiss.

Kaiba shivered at those words and his pride refused to let him say, "Yes." Somehow he had lost his own point and he could only hope that he didn't look as lost as he felt in his confusion.

Unfortunately for Kaiba, he looked every bit as lost as he was. It made Yami hesitant to proceed and he knew how quickly Kaiba could turn on him in a situation like this. Instead of expressing his concern, Yami leaned down and started to sensuously kiss his way from Kaiba's neck up to his ear. "Let me show you, Seto," Yami murmured before he started to suckle on Kaiba's earlobe.

When Yami's hands started to wander, Kaiba shifted uncomfortably on the bed, not entirely sure he was okay with what he was about to allow to happen. Despite his reservations, Kaiba's body reacted favorably to the teasing touches and his noise of protest became one of need.

Yami wanted to know what had happened, but more than that, he wanted to make it better for Kaiba. If he didn't know any better, Yami would have thought that Kaiba was granting him permission to top, but it almost seemed wrong under those circumstances. Figuring he would continue until he was stopped, Yami started to become more aggressive in his techniques. Yami nipped more than normal as he worked his way down Kaiba's body with kisses and torturous touches. He was encouraged by the sounds Kaiba was starting to let escape, but Yami still hesitated as his hand continued drifting. Something wasn't quite right about the situation, but Yami didn't know what was wrong about it.

When Yami's fingers teased Kaiba's entrance, it made him inhale sharply in surprise. It wasn't that the action was unexpected, but Kaiba was still startled by it all the same. He tensed as one of Yami's dry fingers applied just enough pressure to barely penetrate, just enough to let Kaiba know his intentions and let him stop it before things went any further.

There wasn't enough of a reaction for Yami to judge whether it was what Kaiba really wanted and he looked up questioningly into those conflicted blue eyes for a clue. Receiving no answer, Yami could only question, "Seto…?"

"_What_?" Kaiba growled, wishing Yami would just get on with it.

Despite the confidence of his earlier forward actions, Yami sounded unsure as he tried to ask, "Is this…?"

Even through the mess in his mind, Kaiba realized that Yami was trying to ask for permission to continue. It struck him as strange, particularly since Kaiba didn't exactly return the courtesy. Even after almost a year together, Yami was still respectfully hesitant, despite his obvious want and Kaiba wasn't sure how it made him feel or even what it was supposed to make him feel.

Unable to bring himself to verbally consent, Kaiba stretched to reach the lube he had retrieved earlier and held it up to Yami. The former pharaoh accepted it and the implied acceptance, so he wasted no further time on such thoughts.

Liberally coating his fingers with the slick substance, Yami slipped in a single finger to start. Kaiba seemed tighter than normal and Yami recognized that it was a result of all the tension in his body. He worked with a patience that drove Kaiba insane and caused him to grumble something that sounded suspiciously like, "Speed it the fuck up."

Getting the second finger in was done with some amount of difficulty and Yami hadn't missed Kaiba's attempt to smother a noise of discomfort. Yami glanced at Kaiba, but he was staring at the ceiling with a blank expression. Even though Yami knew it would probably be counterproductive, he still said as gently as possible, "Seto, I need you to relax…"

Kaiba huffed and said nothing in response, but he took a deep breath and tried to force himself to obey for his own benefit. It lessened some of the soreness, but Kaiba was impatient. "Enough," he finally ordered, his patience at an end.

"No, it's not," Yami disagreed. He had barely managed to get his two fingers in to the point where they had Kaiba sufficiently prepared to receive a third one, let alone his whole cock.

"I said it's enough!" Kaiba snapped, not showing his shock over how harsh he sounded. He kept telling himself to get back in control, but Kaiba was losing his grip amongst all of the confusing emotions and revolting memories that he was struggling to keep at bay.

The tone of voice caused Yami's eyes to widen in a good imitation of his aibou and he tried to understand what was going on in Kaiba's mind. "And I'm telling you it's not," Yami evenly replied, his fingers continuing to stretch Kaiba. He knew from experience the consequences of rushing and Yami had no desire to subject Kaiba to that pain. It was difficult enough getting Kaiba to agree to bottom normally and Yami didn't want a bad experience to make it impossible in the future.

"Yami!"

"I'm not going to hurt you," Yami said quietly, refusing to let things escalate.

Kaiba glared at Yami and stated in a steely tone, "I'm telling you it's enough. Move on."

Yami knew that it would be a mistake to proceed, but the almost feral look in Kaiba's eyes stopped him from arguing back further. He didn't want to continue until he knew that Kaiba was properly prepared, but Yami was left with very few options. There was obviously something very important about this to Kaiba, but Yami was still in the dark over it for the most part. Sighing heavily, Yami quietly acquiesced, "Okay," even though he thought it was a terrible idea. He had managed to get Kaiba stretched out a bit, but Yami still didn't think it was sufficient; he could only hope that it was enough to allow for minor discomfort instead of pain.

Dispensing more lube into his palm, Yami thoroughly coated his cock and stroked himself several times trying to buy a little time. Kaiba was watching every movement and was just about to bark another order when Yami repositioned himself.

Trying to be as gentle as possible, Yami carefully started to enter, although he had barely gotten the head in before Kaiba unintentionally flinched in pain. Yami was instantly filled with guilt and he stilled to prevent any further hurt to Kaiba.

It wasn't unbearable, but it stung quite a bit—not nearly enough for Kaiba to quit, though. "Keep going," he told Yami, shifting his hips and spreading his legs a little further apart to try and help facilitate the process.

While the visual of Kaiba splayed beneath him made Yami lust with want, he couldn't indulge in it knowing that Kaiba wasn't enjoying it. Yami started to protest, but Kaiba wouldn't hear of it. "I said keep going!" Kaiba snapped, his eyes flashing in indignation at the implication he wasn't capable of withstanding something that was barely a twinge of discomfort.

Complying against his own wishes, Yami didn't even make it halfway in before Kaiba failed to hold back a grunt. Stopping again, Yami pleaded, "Seto, _please_—"

"Did I tell you to stop?" Kaiba demanded, his voice tight with repressed pain.

"Help me understand," Yami requested, his crimson eyes searching blue for anything that might give him a clue. Something was seriously wrong and it worried Yami.

"Do as you're told," Kaiba coldly ordered, stunning Yami further.

Staring in disbelief at Kaiba, Yami's voice raised slightly as he exclaimed, "What the hell!"

"What part of that did you not understand?"

It was more than Yami could tolerate and he started to pull out but Kaiba prevented it by locking his legs around the former pharaoh. When Yami started to struggle, Kaiba used brute force to push him in all the way to the hilt. Kaiba shouted out several obscenities as the pain temporarily blurred his vision. His breathing became ragged and Kaiba was suddenly starting to realize that it had perhaps not been the best idea. The fact that those normally proud crimson eyes were filled with pain confused Kaiba almost as much as the fact that it almost physically hurt to hear Yami whisper, "Why? Why are you doing this?"

Kaiba couldn't answer him immediately and instead his hands instinctively started to reach out to comfort Yami before he stopped them. He had to keep reminding himself that this wasn't about that, but he still had to fight the urge.

Resting his forehead on Kaiba's chest, Yami mournfully questioned, "What happened, Seto?" Now more than ever, Yami wished for the Millennium Puzzle's ability to connect them. He wanted to embrace Kaiba with all of his soul, to help Kaiba understand the feelings that were there between them and know why this was so painful to endure.

Even though his body was screaming at him for his rash stupidity, Kaiba commanded, "Continue."

Yami's head snapped up and he exclaimed, "You can't possibly be—you're _actually_ serious!"

"_Move_."

"Seto, no—" Yami started to protest, but to no avail.

Lacing his fingers through Yami's hair and pulling him down, Kaiba captured his lips in a kiss that was strangely gentle given his recent behavior. "Would you deny me?" Kaiba murmured in a tone that sounded so utterly seductive that Yami almost moaned despite the bizarre situation.

"No, but please, not like this…"

All traces of gentleness gone, Kaiba threatened, "Move or I'm flipping you over and continuing myself," and he fully intended to carry it out if Yami disobeyed.

The decision was absolutely wrenching for Yami and he tried to plead his case one last time, "Seto, please don't do this…"

Kaiba only said, "_Yami_," as his eyes issued his final warning, his muscles clenching in silent encouragement.

It was obvious that Kaiba was going to continue whether Yami agreed or not. Figuring that having a modicum of control was preferable to being forced to watch flat on his back and unable to do anything, Yami carefully pulled back a little before pushing back in again.

While it appeased Kaiba that Yami was finally listening, it still wasn't enough to satiate the fire burning inside of him that he didn't understand. "I won't break," Kaiba reminded him, pushing his hips up to meet Yami's weak thrust.

It felt too wet and too warm for Yami to ignore the damage he had already been an accessory to and he could only stare at Kaiba with a silent plea in his eyes. "You can still get hurt," Yami argued, wanting Kaiba to come to his senses. There was so much that Yami didn't understand and it pained him almost as much as what he was doing.

"It is of no consequence."

"How can you say that?" Yami incredulously demanded, ceasing all movement once more.

"Because it is the truth," Kaiba replied in a matter of fact tone that stunned Yami into silence.

Yami was so lost and it was obvious that he wasn't going to get any guidance from Kaiba on the matter. "I don't want to hurt you…" Yami tried one more time, hoping against all odds that Kaiba would finally wake up from whatever was plaguing him.

"Do you think I don't know my own limits?" Kaiba asked, hooking his legs behind Yami and forcing him deeper with a grunt.

That was the problem; Kaiba had a ridiculous tolerance for pain because of his adopted father and Yami couldn't bear to think of what he was doing. "Seto…"

"_Harder_," Kaiba commanded, never breaking eye contact with Yami.

Closing his eyes and resting his head on Kaiba's chest once more, Yami tried to collect himself. He wanted to trust in Kaiba, wanted to trust that he knew what he was doing, but Yami wasn't so sure that the other even understood his own reactions. It went far beyond the issue of belonging to anyone and Yami didn't know what to do. This wasn't what Yami wanted, but it seemed to be what Kaiba needed and the former pharaoh just didn't understand. All he could think of was that time they had dueled on top of Pegasus' castle; Kaiba had the same wild look in his eyes and Yami knew that refusing a proper battle would have pushed him over the edge all the same. His throat tightened when he remembered seeing Kaiba so close to that edge and Yami wasn't sure how to pull him back from the brink this time unless he gave in to what was being demanded. Yami had trusted in him then and fought without fear, so why was he so hesitant to do the same now?

Realizing that the only viable option at the moment was to trust Kaiba and give in to what he wanted in order to understand it, Yami straightened up and opened his eyes before pulling almost all the way out and slamming back in again. The fact that Kaiba's loud cry of pain sounded like it was almost on the verge of pleasure disturbed Yami deeply, but it was enough to get him to continue. Temporarily sacrificing speed for strength, Yami shifted his position and repeated the action, earning him a louder cry that trailed off into a moan that was undeniably laced with enjoyment. He knew that Kaiba tended to like it a little rougher, but Yami thought it was ridiculous and became even more concerned.

Against his better judgment, Yami continued pounding into Kaiba, eventually picking up the pace and establishing an unforgiving rhythm. For every thrust, Kaiba met him with an equal or harder one, his body beautifully arching off the bed from the intensity of it all. Yami had never heard Kaiba be so vocal before and it cut straight through him every time it sounded like pain. Every kiss was turned into a vicious battle and Yami struggled to stay above it, tried to hold onto his sanity amongst the surreal coupling that was giving him very little satisfaction.

The experience was rapidly rendering Kaiba incapable of thought and he was more than okay with that for once. He was vaguely aware that he was crying out half formed thoughts and commands, sighing Yami's name even as he gasped in a pain that had crossed the threshold of pleasure, but it was beyond Kaiba's control as he grasped at the sheets while his body writhed. Every, "More," "Faster," and, "Harder," that he demanded was given to him without question and Kaiba lost himself in the punishing pace that was bringing him closer to release. Pain had become pleasure and there was nothing left except the extreme sensations that finally made Kaiba forget even as he moaned his enjoyment.

Yami was desperate for it to end and he started firmly pumping Kaiba's member in an effort to bring him to completion as quickly as possible. It didn't take long for Kaiba to cum with a loud wordless shout and Yami could only watch as the taunt body finally relaxed when he was finished. Even though Kaiba looked relaxed and somewhat satiated at last, Yami was still disgust with himself. Unable to stand it for a moment longer, Yami pulled out and was sickened by what he saw. The briefest glimpse of red pushed Yami past the point of his emotions and he was crying before he realized it.

The release had brought Kaiba some amount of clarity from his previous frenzied state, but he didn't understand why Yami suddenly burst into tears. "What?" Kaiba asked him, unable to comprehend the bizarre reaction.

"_What_?" Yami repeated, sounding almost hysterical. "You have to ask me, 'What?' _Seriously_?"

When Yami broke into full blown sobs, Kaiba officially became mystified. It was the first time he had ever seen Yami cried and Kaiba hated it—all the more so because he seemed to be responsible for it somehow. Struggling to sit up and wincing from the action, Kaiba awkwardly pulled Yami into an embrace. Yami fought against it, further confounding Kaiba. "Yami…"

Angrily wiping away his tears, Yami looked up at Kaiba with a fierceness that started him. "What happened?" Yami demanded, needing an answer. "And don't you even _try_ to say that it has nothing to do with me."

More than anything else, Kaiba was shocked that seeing Yami still shedding tears hurt the most. "Why are you crying?" Kaiba asked softly, wiping away another errant tear. For him, that was the most immediate problem.

Making an incredulous sound that got caught in a sniffle, Yami couldn't even begin to articulate the entirety of the issue. Kaiba looked genuinely baffled and Yami just didn't know how to deal with it or the sudden calmness after such a disastrous storm. "Do you think I _enjoyed_ that?" Yami finally questioned Kaiba, staring him straight in the eyes again. "Enjoyed doing that to you?"

"Obviously not, or else you would have cum," Kaiba answered bluntly, not realizing it was the wrong thing to say.

"What the hell is your problem?" Yami exploded, shoving Kaiba away from him in his outrage. "You think that's what this is about? That I didn't fucking cum?"

Kaiba could only blink at Yami, stunned by the action and accusations. Looking away briefly, Kaiba honestly admitted, "I don't know what this is about."

"Figure it out," Yami told him coldly before getting up from the bed.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?" Kaiba asked, raising his voice inadvertently. Yami had never spoken to him in that tone before and it sent a chill through Kaiba; it was a side of the former pharaoh that he wasn't sure he wanted to get to know.

Stopping to glance over his shoulder, Yami looked at Kaiba with all of the pain and confusion he felt in that moment, trying not to get sick when he saw some blood trailing in rivulets down Kaiba's thigh. "To try and get clean," Yami icily replied, the bile rising up in the back of his throat as he turned toward the bathroom and went inside, slamming the door behind him so hard that it shook.

Kaiba could only stare at the door and he was floored by what had just happened. He had seen Yami upset before, but this was an entirely different level and Kaiba didn't know how to process it. Part of him was pissed that Yami had chosen to seal himself away in the one place Kaiba considered his sanctuary, but there were plenty other bathrooms. Deciding to give Yami time to calm himself since he seemed to be so emotional, Kaiba conceded that finding the bathroom across the hall would have to suffice. Then he could figure out what the hell was bothering Yami to the point of isolation; right now his mind was too muddled from his intense climax.

When he tried to move, the pain shot straight up his spine and Kaiba looked down at the sheets with disbelief. There was blood all over them—_his_ blood—and it was still on his skin. Kaiba became nauseous at the sight and then realization dawned on him when he realized what he had made Yami do. His eyes went wide as Yami's reaction started to make sense and Kaiba was overcome by the enormity of what had just occurred because he had temporarily lost control. "Oh, _shit_," Kaiba cursed softly, his hands shaking as he tried to straighten the sheets as if that would somehow help. He was disgusted with himself and his mind was reeling at the impact of the situation on Yami. How could Kaiba even start to explain it to him? Because he would have to be honest about it; he owed Yami at least that much.

Curling his legs to his chest, Kaiba wrapped his arms around his shins and rested his forehead on his knees. Even though it didn't change a thing, Kaiba found himself whispering to the empty bedroom in shock, "Yami, I'm so sorry…"

"…:::…"

Once Yami finally emerged from the bathroom, the sheets had already been changed and Kaiba was lying on top of them, fresh from his own shower. He watched as Yami warily approached the bed and Kaiba tried not to take it personally. Yami's eyes were still bloodshot from crying earlier and the guarded look haunting that crimson drove the guilt further through Kaiba. It made Kaiba's stomach churn to know he was responsible for that look, knowing that he was responsible for all of it.

When Yami got close enough to the bed, Kaiba said in a calm voice that was muffled by his pillow, "We need to talk."

The fact that Kaiba had spoken first was somewhat surprising to Yami and he softly agreed, "Yes, we do," as he sat on the bed.

Turning onto his side and silently thanking the painkillers that allowed him to do it without wincing, Kaiba couldn't help but notice just how red Yami's skin was from his shower; it almost looked like he had tried to scald himself in his efforts to get clean. "I'm…sorry," Kaiba started off, needing to say it without prompting in order for him to feel that it had the proper impact.

"So am I," Yami responded, resting his hands in his lap.

"That…never should have happened like it did," Kaiba started, unable to take his eyes off of Yami's muted sadness.

"No, it shouldn't have happened at all," Yami agreed. "I shouldn't have let it get as far as it did."

The latter part of the comment caused Kaiba to sit up and properly face Yami. "Don't you dare try to blame yourself, Yami," Kaiba told him in a fierce tone, ignoring the remnants of pain that he knew from experience were going to be even worse tomorrow.

Raising an eyebrow at that, Yami said nothing as he waited for Kaiba to continue.

Hanging his head, Kaiba tried to figure out how to say what he needed to, but it was hard for him to do. _But it's not harder than what you made him do_, Kaiba reminded himself and it was enough to make him look Yami in the eyes again. "I was reacting to…something that I—something that I saw earlier," Kaiba haltingly tried to explain.

"Earlier today?" Yami asked for clarification, waiting patiently now that he had cooled off some.

"Yes," Kaiba confirmed, not wanting to think about it, let alone talk about it. Taking a deep breath, Kaiba tried to remain calm as he finally let Yami know about what had happened with Bakura. "Before I came to get you, I received a phone call."

"Is everything okay?" Yami asked, instantly filled with concern. "Is Mokuba fine?"

The reaction was so absolutely Yami that Kaiba couldn't help but chuckle softly. "He's fine," Kaiba reassured him. "The call was just my secretary calling to get clearance to schedule a few meetings, so I went to that empty room for some privacy."

"Okay," Yami responded, sensing that Kaiba was starting to stall for time.

"Bakura was already there, but I didn't realize it until after I had already entered," Kaiba finally said, swearing that he could almost feel the rage flaring from Yami's soul.

"What did that bastard do to you?" Yami demanded, his eyes narrowing dangerously at the thought of Bakura harming Kaiba.

Sighing heavily and shifting positions, Kaiba had to admit, "Nothing," even though he hated it.

When Yami started to protest, Kaiba held up his hand to silence him. It was hard enough to say without Yami interrupting him with his emotions. "He was getting a blowjob from Chisanaga," Kaiba told him, shuddering at the memory.

Yami's eyes went wide at the information and he could only shake his head. "Why am I not surprised?" he muttered, feeling bad for the teacher that had probably been blackmailed into the relationship. "Did Bakura…_say_ anything to you?"

"Oh, he always says shit," Kaiba said dismissively, although it wasn't far from the truth. "The problem was…I saw something. A _memory_."

"From ancient Egypt?" Yami asked softly, a sense of dread forming in the pit of his stomach.

Nodding, Kaiba stared at the sheets and wanted so badly to hold Yami at that moment. Even though they were close enough to almost touch, it felt like there was so much distance between them at that moment and it bothered Kaiba more than he cared to admit. "I saw…that bastard priest," Kaiba tried to say, but his words started to fail him. Even thinking about the memory made him want to shower again, but he persevered. "He was…he was with the thief."

"And by, 'with,' you mean…?" Yami prompted.

"The priest was…on his knees," Kaiba said in a voice barely above a whisper, unable to look at Yami any longer. "For _that_ asshole."

It was a piece of information that Yami didn't know what to do with and he had to ask, "The priest was blowing Bakura?"

Sounding almost as miserable as he felt, Kaiba confirmed, "Yes," and felt like he had failed Yami somehow.

Letting the knowledge sink in, Yami decided he could think about its meaning to him later. Right now he was more concerned about the almost overwhelming sense of despair coming from Kaiba over it. Reaching up to tilt Kaiba's head up in order to force their gazes to meet once more, Yami searched those blue eyes for sentiments unspoken. "And you were trying to punish yourself for the priest's failings?" Yami asked him softly, cupping Kaiba's cheek in the palm of his hand and caressing him gently.

Unintentionally leaning into the caress, Kaiba denied, "No, I mean—well, I guess that would make _sense_, but that's not what I was doing. I just…I'm not _him_."

"I know you're not him," Yami reaffirmed, "and whatever Seto did—"

"No!" Kaiba growled, needing Yami to understand. "He—with _him_—and I just can't…I can't—I will never…"

"You'll never forgive him," Yami gently finished, his eyes filled with understanding.

Moving out of the comfort of Yami's hand, Kaiba couldn't deny the thought. "I just don't understand! I mean, why would he…_how_ could he…? With _him_?"

"He had his reasons."

"What the hell reason is there?" Kaiba angrily demanded.

Yami didn't have an answer to the question, so he could only offer an unsatisfactory, "I don't know, but I'm sure in his mind there was a justifiable reason."

"Wait, do you actually _forgive_ him?" Kaiba asked incredulously as he stared at Yami in disbelief. "How could you?"

Smiling wanly, Yami corrected him, "I didn't say that."

"Then?"

"Aren't you the one who is always saying that things that happened in the past have no impact in the future?" Yami reminded Kaiba, somewhat bemused at the irony that he was the one using the argument for once. "What the priest did then has nothing to do with the current you, right?"

The logic was deceptively simple for something so monumentally upsetting and Kaiba couldn't accept it so readily. "Yes, but that's just…" he tried to say before stopping again.

A silence descended between them and Kaiba tried not to fidget in his nervousness. "Yami, I didn't mean to—I didn't mean for you to…" Kaiba started to apologize without much success. "I just didn't realize that…what I was doing…"

"You weren't yourself," Yami added, wanting to help Kaiba, but unwilling to let the issue slide.

"That doesn't make it right," Kaiba muttered.

"At least you recognize that much," Yami said with a sad smile.

The subtle reprimand made Kaiba look away in shame. What could he possibly say to make such a terrible thing right? All he wanted to do was hold Yami tightly, to reassure himself that it was okay, but there felt like an insurmountable distance between them.

Yami was somewhat surprised that Kaiba looked more miserable that that moment than he had during the incident. It would be so easy to reach out and comfort Kaiba, to reassure him in his loss, but Yami wasn't quite there yet. He was still disturbed by his own actions and Yami had to fight to keep the images at bay. "What will you do if you find out there's more to their…situation?" Yami quietly questioned, completely startled by the momentary panic that flitted through Kaiba's eyes. "We both know that couldn't have been the end of it."

The thought that more had happened between the priest and the thief absolutely sickened Kaiba and he suppressed a shudder. "I don't know," Kaiba honestly answered, although his voice sounded unsteady. "How much do you _know_?"

Shrugging, Yami truthfully admitted, "Not much, but I get the feeling that there's more going on than we remember."

"Did you know about that bastard priest?" Kaiba exclaimed, finally meeting that crimson gaze again. Yami looked too calm and controlled fair to be anything except an act and that bothered Kaiba; he wasn't used to the former pharaoh feeling like he had to hide anything from him. "About what he _did_?"

"I didn't know about that, no," Yami told him, still unsure what to do with the information. It was upsetting, but not nearly as much as the undercurrent of emotion that was hinting that there was something important about the incident he was supposed to remember.

"But you know about other things?" Kaiba asked with dread, not certain that he could handle any more disturbing information right now.

Trying to think of the least offensive way to say it, Yami finally admitted, "Not quite, but I'm aware that things _did_ happen. I just don't know what."

"Do you know why?"

It was the one question that Yami didn't want to answer. He didn't know the details, but he knew enough that he couldn't claim that the pharaoh was completely innocent and undeserving of whatever had happened. It was on issues like this that Yami most clearly felt the separation between his present self and his former existence. "Not specifically."

"Generally, then," Kaiba said, bracing himself for what would probably be an upsetting revelation.

Sighing heavily, Yami toyed with the blankets, smoothing out imaginary wrinkles. "I don't know what you want to hear," Yami finally said quietly. "I don't know enough to make any assumptions."

"Does it have to do with Nefersherit?" Kaiba tersely demanded, saying the woman's name out loud for the first time.

Yami stared at Kaiba in disbelief and he started to wonder just how much Kaiba really knew about her. "You…know of her?" Yami asked in disbelief.

"Somewhat. I've never seen her, though."

Frowning, Yami said, "Neither have I."

"You've never seen the woman you were supposedly engaged to?" Kaiba questioned, sounding slightly miffed.

Yami was starting to understand Kaiba's continual insistence on stressing, "That wasn't me." Nefersherit had been engaged to the pharaoh; Yami had only Kaiba in the present and that was all that he wanted. "I might have seen her without knowing who she was," Yami conceded, although it displeased him. "I just don't know."

Running his fingers through his hair in agitation, Kaiba tried to let the issue drop. It was simply serving to distract him from his original problem and that wasn't productive. The whole situation left him feeling almost dangerously vulnerable and he hated it almost as much as he hated feeling like Yami was untouchable, like Kaiba had somehow lost that right through his extreme reaction.

Things had progressed to a stalemate and Kaiba decided to end it with a decisive action. Boldly reaching out, Kaiba enveloped Yami in a fierce hug, holding onto him tightly as he hid his face against the former pharaoh's shoulder. Yami was too stunned to immediately return the embrace and he awkwardly remained still as Kaiba apologized again in a whisper, "I'm sorry, Yami…"

Kaiba looked so small in childlike in that moment and Yami's gaze softened as he finally put his arms around him in return. Trying to get comfortable, Yami shifted his position and wrapped his legs around Kaiba's waist and snuggled closer out of habit. Unsure of what else to do, Yami could only say, "Oh, Seto..."

"I shouldn't have lost control," Kaiba muttered, still frustrated by the lapse in his normally impeccable self restraint.

"I wouldn't have wanted you to keep that inside," Yami told Kaiba, lightly toying with the brunet's hair, a small comforting gesture.

"It would have been better than making you—" Kaiba started to argue before abruptly cutting himself off mid-sentence.

Instead of belaboring the point further, Yami decided to take a different route to try and come to a better understanding. "Did you enjoy it?" Yami asked in a neutral tone.

Kaiba was glad that he wasn't looking at Yami because he felt his face flush with shame. It had felt great in that moment, but Kaiba couldn't stand to admit such a terrible thing. He had always known that he had a weird relationship with pain, but that was more than Kaiba cared to know about himself in that area. "How could I enjoy doing that to you?" Kaiba retorted in disgust.

That had never been an issue for Yami; he knew that Kaiba wouldn't have enjoyed that aspect of what happened. Leaning back and forcing Kaiba to look at him, Yami asked, "Is that what you think belonging to me means?"

"What? No, of course not!" Kaiba immediately denied, appalled by the very thought of it.

"Then what does it mean to you?" Yami questioned, wanting to hear Kaiba say it.

Regretting ever saying anything about it in the first place, Kaiba still felt he owed it to Yami to clarify. The problem was that Kaiba didn't have the words to express something that personal. The only word he could think of was, "Everything," but it just didn't seem to be enough.

Yami had half expected to get the run around for an answer and he was touched by the quiet sincerity in Kaiba's voice. "Except for that?"

"Even that," Kaiba disagreed before he realized what he had said. "I mean, there's no one else that I've ever…been able to _show_ that—to show that side of myself to. That I would…trust to…"

Kissing Kaiba's temple, Yami hugged him tighter. Now that he actually thought about it, Yami realized just how far Kaiba had come in that regard. Before, Kaiba would have walled him out to deal with it alone so that he didn't appear as weak; in all likeliness, Yami probably would have been thrown out of the room before things got as far as they had, if not the mansion itself. It warmed him to know how much Kaiba trusted him, but it still bothered Yami how it had been twisted by his own actions. "I just wanted to help," Yami finally told Kaiba, knowing that commenting on the confession would lead to scorn.

"You did," Kaiba argued, knowing from experience how much worse it would have been if he had kept all of those emotions contained.

"_Without_ hurting you," Yami corrected with a frown.

Having become apathetic about injuries because of Gozaburo's abuse, Kaiba stated, "It'll heal."

"But what about you?" Yami asked. "Especially the next time…"

Not understanding Yami's point of concern, Kaiba prompted, "What about it?"

Taking a calming breath, Yami tried to delicately explain, "I mean the next time I'm on top. I don't want you agreeing because you feel that you have to make up for…this."

It was exactly what Kaiba would have done to try and make things even and prove that he had moved beyond it and he looked at Yami in confusion. Sometimes Kaiba forgot just how perceptive Yami was when it came to figuring out how he worked. "But—"

Yami interrupted, "No, I want you to do it because you _want_ to, Seto. Not because you feel you have to."

Needing to see Yami, but unwilling to relinquish the contact, Kaiba sighed and pulled back just enough for eye contact. "I don't do that because I feel obligated," Kaiba told him haughtily. "It's just…shit, it just goes against everything that I was…taught."

"But it's not about submitting or giving up control," Yami pointed out, assuming those were Kaiba's qualms. "I just want you to feel good."

Kaiba tried a final time to explain, "It's not about that—well, it _is_, but—it's just instinct."

"I know, which is why I don't push the issue," Yami told him.

Finally saying what he had longed suspected, Kaiba stated, "But it bothers you."

"Sometimes," Yami truthfully admitted, "but I understand."

"That's…"

Trying somewhat to lighten the tension, Yami teased, "Besides, you act like I object to it the other way around."

It did little to alleviate the guilt Kaiba was still suffering from. "I didn't mean to make you cry," Kaiba said softly, the image still seared in his mind. He never wanted to be responsible for that again; it was unforgivable.

"You didn't mean for any of it to happen," Yami pointed out, "but it did and we deal with it to move on. I'm sure it won't be the last time and you're definitely not the first one to make me cry. So don't worry about it."

The thought of doing something in the future to make Yami cry was upsetting. "I just want to protect you," Kaiba whispered as he buried his face in the crook of Yami's neck again.

"You can't protect me from everything, Seto," Yami said gently as he nuzzled Kaiba, knowing how important that point was to him.

"Yes, I can," Kaiba stubbornly argued, silently swearing that he would protect Yami from everything—including himself.

Chuckling softly, Yami couldn't help but smile a little at that. Things once again stalled between them and Yami finally broke the extended silence by questioning, "Can I ask you something?"

Nodding, Kaiba felt a slight anxiety over what kind of question Yami felt he needed permission to ask. Kaiba was bothered by how much he was already talking, but the need to make it okay for Yami took precedence. Besides, Yami hadn't stipulated that Kaiba was required to answer the question, so there was always that technicality if it was needed.

"When was the last time you cried?"

It was an odd question in Kaiba's opinion and he actually had to think back in order to find an answer. "When my mom died," Kaiba finally responded. "I didn't know any better back then."

The answer saddened Yami and he found himself adding a follow up, "How old were you?"

Shrugging, Kaiba guessed, "Five or six?" He had been too young to do anything except cry back then, but Kaiba had quickly learned that such things were useless.

It was rare for Kaiba to talk about his real parents and Yami found himself continuing, "What about your dad?"

"I had to be strong for Mokuba," Kaiba said by way of answer. Even though he had only been ten, Kaiba had figured out that much and assumed that responsibility.

Yami was somewhat surprised to hear that and yet not at all. "But what about when he wasn't there?" Yami asked softly, unable to imagine how a child couldn't mourn the loss of a parent. Even with his scattered memories, Yami still remembered crying when his father died, leaving him as the pharaoh of Egypt.

"Crying would have changed nothing," Kaiba commented with a level of realism that disturbed Yami. "I didn't even cry when Mokuba was kidnapped. It was more productive to get him back than waste time with tears."

It was so harsh and Yami had to wonder how much of that perspective was a result of Gozaburo's "training." Yami didn't take the comment personally, but he still said, "Sometimes it just happens."

"Only to other people," Kaiba argued back out of habit, a slight defensive edge coming into his voice. He had a twisted sense of pride about being strong enough to never give in to such things and Kaiba resented the implication in light of how much he had already flagrantly displayed his weakness.

"You don't always have to be that strong," Yami told Kaiba, brushing a stray hair away from his face.

Unable to look at Yami, Kaiba muttered, "Didn't I just prove that I'm not?"

"You're fine," Yami reassured him, gently kissing him to further prove it.

Kaiba returned it with an almost sense of desperation; there was an overwhelming need for absolution, for forgiveness, for reassurance that he hadn't somehow ruined things. When they parted, Kaiba still sensed a certain aloofness from Yami and it was upsetting to him. Even when they had been connected through the Millennium Puzzle, Kaiba had never felt so open to another as he did at the present moment. It would have been downright terrifying if it weren't for the fact that he was distracted by all of the other nebulous emotions that were swirling around inside of him. It was just frustrating to know that he had completely bared himself to Yami on the issue and he still felt like he was being shut out in return. Was this how Yami normally felt when the situation was reversed as it was normally?

His instincts were screaming at him to shut Yami out, but Kaiba ignored it. While it was disheartening to have such a reaction to a rare moment of complete openness, Kaiba knew he deserved it and worse for what he had done. Kaiba just didn't know what else to do except give Yami time.

When Yami sensed Kaiba withdrawing into himself, he almost cursed in aggravation. "_Don't_," Yami told Kaiba, knowing how difficult it would be to overcome the walls once they were reinforced by his embarrassment. "Seto, I just don't…I mean, just keep thinking about what I did to you—"

Kaiba interrupted, "But I _ordered_ you to," as if that somehow made it better.

"And if I ordered you to punch me in the face as hard as you could, would you do it?" Yami asked somewhat facetiously.

"Of course not," Kaiba scoffed, although it succeeded in making Yami's point.

"Looking, I'm not mad or anything," Yami tried to explain. "I just need time to, 'process,' as you say."

Nodding his consented, Kaiba's grip loosened a little in his relief. "You'll stay?"

"I'm not going anywhere," Yami promised with a small smile.

"I meant the night," Kaiba specified, not wanting to let go of Yami yet.

Even though it was a school night, Yami consented with a, "Sure," given the circumstances.

Murmuring, "Thank you," before kissing Yami hesitantly, Kaiba finally relaxed a little.

Sighing softly, Yami rested his head against Kaiba's as he remained in the embrace. Kissing Kaiba's shoulder, Yami closed his eyes and tried to settle his own emotions. There were lots of things that he needed to think about, but it would have to wait until he had a clearer mind. For the moment, it seemed that Kaiba was okay and that was more important to Yami; he hadn't forgiven himself completely, but at least now he understood.

* * *

**A/N:** A special thanks goes out to Bahen, Elirian, Farao-sama, Ko, and Ravelqueen for convincing me that this story was worth sharing. This is what started it all and while I never thought I would write a story quite like this, I'm glad that I listened to them. My eternal gratitude to all of you wonderful ladies and to everyone else who keeps me motivated to put out these stories!

A lot of complicated things going on in this story to lay groundwork later, so it's one I'll be referring to down the line.

Next week should be a return to fluffier stuff, so more smut of a happier kind! I'm sure after this heavy drangst, it'll be a welcome change of pace in the Entangled Series.

So please be sure to check back on **Sunday, March 15th** for **a new Entangled story** update and I'd love to hear your thoughts on this chapter!


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